Side A :
911 Call: "Help I've Overdosed on Philosophy!" / Self Help Specialist Ends Own Life / I Am a Trans-Continental Railroad, Please Run a Train on Me / Stop Calling Us Screamo / You Don't Understand the Liquor is Calling the Shots Now Randy Bobandy / You Can't Get Goose Justice in Fox Court, Just Spit on the Judge
Side B :
Atrocities from a Story Book Perspective / An Introduction for People Who Hate Introductions / Jimmy Buffett Doesn't Even Surf / Soap Opera Stardom is a Single is A Single Tear Drop Away / Pep Talk from a Nihilist / Fashion Statements of the Socially Aware / Absolutely Absolute Absolution